This is the age where technological advances are cutting off the children’s lives from the parents, emails and sms s are taking over heart to heart chats over a cozy family dinner.Wine and dine has become the in thing even amongst the school children. Being bombarded by their tech savvy kids parents are finding it difficult to even break the ice, leave alone a friendly talk. This alarming trend of ‘snapping the fuse of communication box’ is leading to juvenile crime, strained relations and depression.

TCG had a close interaction with the popular ‘reel’ mother Mrs.Jayasudha to find out the reasons behind these strained relations and advice to the parents as to how to get closer with your kids….

TCG: How did you get to know about KAB? Can you us tell the reason behind coming to KAB?

JS: I was looking for proper guidance in the next step for my son’s education. Hence I came to KAB.

TCG: What were the problems you faced when you moved to this state from Chennai?

JS: Frankly I was disillusioned at the state of affairs here, in spite of Andhra Pradesh being my home. The moment I told people that my son passed out for the NOS (National Open School) Chennai, their reactions were loud and not very encouraging. The general perception about people passing out from NOS is that the NOS child/student does not fall in to the ‘normal’ category of students. In fact most of them are alienated and we still have that stigma existing in the society. My son had a math phobia and it took one complete year for him to come out of that, thanks to the Open School. I would like to add here that education does not necessarily mean faring well in academics but in creating curiosity and interest in the student besides bringing out their latent talents. My son, any way, took admissions in one of the best colleges in Hyderabad and is doing well now, but it needed a lot of perseverance from our side.

TCG: Do you think the entry for an outsider (student) is smooth in to the stream of education when he/she moves from one state to the other?

JS: Like we just discussed a brilliant child (in academics) will any way find his way irrespective of the place/state, but what about those who are ‘gifted’ yet do not have the necessary qualification to secure seat? For such students education is always a nightmare. But I certainly see a determination in today’s youngsters who are well-informed and aware of their priorities.

TCG: Where are your children studying now? How closely do you move with them in ‘study matters’?

JS: My elder son is a graduate and the younger is in his plus two. The latter is a national level shooter and has all the ‘fire’ in him to become an entrepreneur soon!
I have always encouraged my children to study, not for marks but to satisfy their thirst for knowing things/facts. Every child is unique, as we have all seen in Taare Zameen Par but it is for the parents to see and encourage their kids in their line of interest. When children love what they are doing we will not have the necessity to chase and tell them what they have to do.

TCG: Upon a closer look at our educational system, in what ways do you feel a change can be brought about if required?

JS: I am not very well educated to comment on the system but I would like to add that I come from a family of academicians and scholars. It was my ‘defiant’ choice to become an actress at a very young age and I knew I was born for that but I had great respect for education. What I see is that education is making our students more selfish and ego-centric in the name of career less human. Perhaps academicians and policy makers should do something about this, or are they already working on this?

TCG: What were your aspirations regarding education? Could you fulfill them?

JS: As I told you acting was my ONLY goal in life that didn’t allow me to complete even my schooling. 

TCG: Many parents try to live their unrealized and unfulfilled dreams through their children this the main issue raised by many child psychologists. What is your take on that?

JS: Parents keep forgetting that they were kids once upon a time; perhaps that is the beauty (?) of adulthood? It is sad to that they do not try to relive their childhood though their kids but become too stern with them. I am not against discipline, but not to the extent of cutting out upon their freedom. In fact today’s youth are very well aware of many issues and problems but their basic problem is want of love and emotional security which they do not seem get from their parents. On the other hand I have seen many parents who are like friends and confidantes to their children, supporting them through thick and thin. In fact you will be surprised to know that after doing a television show for the students there were some startling revelations about parents. Many children accused the parents of not giving them the required emotional support. I do not want to project a biased picture about the parents who in spite of so much toil are getting accused, but would request them to be more open with their kids; after all children are a part of us!

TCG: Coming to the Television channels today, most of them concentrate upon tapping talents like music and dance (not the proper dance of course). Very few, or probably none at all show the academically oriented programmes, like debates, quiz, elocution etc. What would you say about that?

JS: I do not totally agree with this because the education system is so grueling that kids look forward to a respite from their studies. They think television programmes like talent shows (dance and singing) not only work as stress busters but also help them to get into limelight quickly. Not every child would again like to study pursue academic interests after returning from school, for it would be like all play and no work; hence it they go for these talent shows, fair enough!

TCG: Is there a need for awareness programmes or social issues to be discussed in the media openly with students?

JS: Definitely. how many parents (especially the bourgeoisie) discuss openly with their kids about drugs, affairs, AIDS etc? It is still a taboo to talk to the children openly about these matters in our society. Issues like these are best sorted our when they faced, not by turning away your face. We can surely have TV shows on matters like these where parents and kids are brought on the same platform for discussions.

TCG: You are known to be a disciplinarian, monitoring your children’s studies, activities time to time? How do you manage to do this?

JS: I was never a Hitler to my kids but at the same time my words (of advice) are etched upon their conscience. It may sound clichéd if I say that my sons keep me informed about every small happening in their life to me and seek my advice too. Though they tried to avoid me in the beginning, they yielded to my ‘chasing’, as they have the trust in me.

TCG: What is your advice to the ‘busy’ professional parents who hardly devote/spend time with their children?

JS: Your career may be very important to sustain you and your family, but remember your children are more important. We can change a career when we are not happy with that but we cannot do it with our kids. Do take enough care of your children and monitor them time to time. Your love will mould them into lovable beings.

TCG: Is there anything particular you would like to share with the mothers of teens?

JS: Be friendly with them, but remember you cannot substitute their friends. Overlook minor matters like slang and fashion etc, but remind them about looking good and doing things for themselves.

TCG: Today’s youth, especially girls aspire to become stars attracted by the glamour of the film world. For many it is like the life span of a firefly, they can be here for a very short time unlike other professions which can sustain them life long. Is this a profession of right choice for them?

JS:  Certainly, young girls have the right to make a choice of their own. There are many young girls/actresses in the industry today who are here with clear intention to make a career, even if is for a few years and willing to quit with good returns. They make smart investments and have good back up plans too. So I do not see this as an uncertain career at all, provided you plan it well.